I missed church today so I decided to “feed myself”, I asked Carl what the sermon was about. He said, “Why?”. I will have to get a recording. In the meantime I created my own “sermon”.
I watched Joyce Meyer.
Found Beth Moore’s Blog.
The Baby Girl and I went to Jungle Jim’s tonight to get a treat for birthday celebration tomorrow at school. She will be 10, how did that happen? I can not describe the joy in my heart when from the back seat she said, “Mom put the radio on that Christian Rock station.” I love that when Mr. Wonderful was sick last week she insisted her and I still needed to go to church and then today she insisted the two of them go even though I was sick.
I think about Easter being a week away and I’m so thankful to be a Christian. I really am amazed at what God has done in my life and my heart. I know He walks beside me everyday, He forgives me everyday. I’m a sinner and He died for me, He died willingly for me so I could have life. Who couldn’t be amazed by that?
I cry everytime I hear the song “I Can Only Imagine”. I know I’m going to Heaven, but I have no idea what it will be like. I imagine it differently each time I let myself think about it. I use to be such a “wishy washy Christian”, I would go to church then life would get in the way. I would backslide and then the next disaster would happen and I would run back to church. All of that changed on February 25, 2005. I read a young mom’s blog today and my heart ached for her. I stand firm in my faith today that God is with us no matter how many times we question Him, no matter how angry we may feel at Him, He knows we are sinners, He knew we were sinners when He hung on that cross, He forgives us.
I struggle with forgiving, I pray about it daily. I try to teach my kids to forgive the little and the big hurts that life deals them. Today The Baby Girl has talked about her Deadbeat Father several times, I’ve listened. I had to pray a lot today because as a momma I want to take that hurt away, but I can’t. As a mother I feel responsible for that hurt, I choose that deadbeat to be her father. However, I also choose to take her to church each week and because of that she knows she has a heavenly Father who loves her and is always there. I just know The Baby Girl is going to influence other little girls with hearts that are broken because of absentee fathers. I know God is going to get the glory because at ten The Baby Girl has a strong relationship with God.
Mark 11:25 And whenever you make a prayer, let there be forgiveness in your hearts, if you have anything against anyone; so that you may have forgiveness for your sins from your Father who is in heaven.
I try to live with forgiveness in my heart, I struggle with it. I have lots of journal entries about how do you forgive someone who has wronged you and never asked for forgiveness. I don’t have an answer, I just do it. I don’t always allow that person to have the opportunity to hurt me again, but I forgive them. I am proud of that. I couldn’t do it without God.