Sweethearts!

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I love the series A Beautiful Life, and although I don’t feel my life is all that beautiful this week, it has been better then I expected.

As I think back over the last week, I am so content.  I think that’s such an odd word to use especially this week, but it’s the perfect word.  I’m content, and it feels so good.

Let’s talk about the week, I started my new job.  I love it.  I DID NOT have to do one single report this week, not one.  I got to do what I love, I got to educate folks about options for older adults.  Boy it felt good. 

This is my fourth “hell week” I named it that last year when it looked like I wasn’t going to be able to take off on the 28th from work (it all worked out, thanks Betsy).  I read my post from the 28th last year, and I just think this year will be diferent.  “The Baby” and I talked about Baby James last night and I told her not to be sad.  I asked her what she pictures him doing and she pictures him in a babybed waiting on us.  I have to say I never questioned “how old” we are in heaven until Baby James’ death, will he be an infant when I finally get to him? 

I know after this week that my big fear of Baby James being forgotten has been solved.  Thanks to The First Born, it may seem silly to other people, but this gesture from her has given me peace that she will always be the oldest.  She will always look out for and protect her siblings.  Remember that contentment I talked about?

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I had my biopsy this week and although nothing is for sure, I feel good that all is well.  The procedure itself was a piece of cake, and then I just had some “issues” in the afternoon but all is well now.

While working today someone noticed my favorite piece of jewerly and told me about a local lady who makes beads that are very similiar to my Troll Beads.  I see a lunch break activity coming soon.

I spent a little time in my craft room tonight, just fiddling.  It was sitting in that room that I love so much that I realized I’m content.

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My prayer shawl is always on the back of my chair.  My “Real Mother” made me that beautiful shawl, hand delivered it to me, drug me out of bed and “made me” talk.  Thanks Queen!

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“The Box” sits on a shelf in the craft room, and I decided to take a peek inside the box tonight. 

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Over to the left of this picture you can see “the hat” (blue and white).  Well it was a hat for Baby James but it’s really one of the little mittens you put on an infant to keep them from scratching their faces. 

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I might just scrapbook those little hands and feet this weekend.  They were perfect!

The post is titled “Sweethearts” and it’s the sweethearts I think of tonight as I work on this post.  My nurse Angel who told me I could go home and come back when I was ready, my friends Karen and Tess who came to the hospital on their days off, my very pregnant sister who never left the hospital, Sherri who celebrated her wedding anniversary holding my hand, Wendy and family who ran back and forth all weekend long, and of course Mr. Wonderful who cared only about me and my feelings through the whole process, Gary and Pastor Brian who showed Carl their hearts and were true witnesses of Christ, and I could go on and on.

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About Michelle

I started my blog as a way to connect with other paper crafters and of course it has gone a totally different direction. I've been able to share my experience as a mother, my hurt and disappointments over not having a relationship with my maternal unit, my walk with God and how knowing Him has changed me and continues to help me grow into the person I strive to be......
This entry was posted in faith, family, friends, Grace, grief, infant loss, life, marriage, religion and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Sweethearts!

  1. Sandy says:

    My heart hurts for your loss and it joys that you can find contentment and courage in the face of adversity. A truly precious tribute to your sweet baby James.

  2. Precious little reminders. Being content is such a good feeling.

    Thanks for sharing this.

    blessings,
    melissa

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