NEGATIVE

I was reading MckMama’s Blog a few minutes ago and was reminded that only a few select folks that read by blog know the stress I carried around for the last couple of week.  The picture below explains it better then any words could…

I am going to share some of the words of wisdom I received from “my posse”-

  • You know I love you more than anything, but if you are it is not good for you or Little Linda for you to be so upset.  Choose what to worry about.  You do not worry about anything you cannot change.
  • HELLOOOOOOO1!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
    IM DYING HERE GIRL!!!  WHATS THE VERDICT!!???
  • OMG take the test.  I’m completely freaked out for you. 
  • Try to relax!!! 
  • So girl you are going to be all right. Your GOD and your posse Ha! will help you through whatever may come.

After the test this was my favorite email….

  • I guess I will have to unravel the baby afghan I have been making.

Until you have walked in the shoes as a grieving mother you can’t understand the feelings I had while thinking I was 42 and pregnant.  I had way too many test while I was in the hospital last month that would have had a negtive impact on a pregnancy, I was too scared to just relax.  I prayed a lot, I cried a lot, and I asked for prayer from “my posse”.  I wonder what people do without prayer.  I wonder what people do without “real friends”, not the superficial friends we all come into contact with, but the “real friends” who pray you through a fear that is overwhelming.  I sent an email and the replies were exactly what I needed…imagine that God knew who to put in my heart to hear exactly what I needed to hear.  God is good!!

I had to postpone my appointment this month to get my tubes tied, but it is rescheduled for December.  I know after this scare that 42, fat and pregnant is not something I want to experience. 

I’m so happy for MckMama and want all of you to know that miracles do happen.  Reading her blog I was reminded that God really is in control, we can all think we are in control if we want to, but it’s all in God’s hands.

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About Michelle

I started my blog as a way to connect with other paper crafters and of course it has gone a totally different direction. I've been able to share my experience as a mother, my hurt and disappointments over not having a relationship with my maternal unit, my walk with God and how knowing Him has changed me and continues to help me grow into the person I strive to be......
This entry was posted in family, infant loss, random thoughts, religion and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to NEGATIVE

  1. Sara Alvey says:

    Interesting how life works, isn’t it? Here you are – excited for that negative. And here I am – scared to death of seeing another negative.
    I do understand how you feel. Not long after Samuel died, I thought I might be pregnant. It would have been the worse timing ever, and I was so relieved I wasn’t pregnant. God is in control.
    And God is good.
    Congrats on NOT being pregnant!

  2. Mel says:

    I wonder why real friends have to read this on a blog!

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