Yes that’s a birthday hat, crazy straws and a big huge bow….did I mention 90 balloons?

I love the big wooden 90….did you notice the little forks?

It was quite simple…..

90 balloons

foam wreath

big bow

wooden numbers

party favors

stapler

hot glue

AND A LOT OF LOVE!!!!!

So this year we have a new dining room table, alright I admit it.  Not new, just saved from ending up at the dump.  I wish I had some before pictures, you’d be in awe of Mr. Wonderful if you could see how different it is.  We think it’s a “Walton’s Table” and we love it.  Keeping in mind the personality of the table I changed my centerpiece this year.

My view from my favorite spot in the living room.

A little closer look.  Don’t you love the “tree”, you would have really loved the look on Mr. Wonderful’s face when I requested a “tree” for my centerpiece.  I must say he is now happy with it, ok he’s not happy with the “tree” he’s happy that I’m happy.  As it should be.

Along with the new table and new centerpiece we also have a new tree.  I love my new skinny, flocked tree.  My son isn’t as impressed, but what does a 21 year old know about Christmas trees?

I love words on my tree, I have a few but never pass one up when I find a new one.

My motto is, “If you don’t believe, you don’t receive.”  The bell beside this ornament was my grandmother’s she gave it to me the Christmas before she passed away.  I cherish it.

The first ornament I put on the tree each year, Baby James’ one and only ornament.

One of my favorite gifts last year, a squirrel ornament from the bestie.  Classic!

I always bring out The Baby Girl’s first Christmas photo, I must say this year I’m asking where does time go?

A few years ago we started putting a tree in her bedroom.

Well, of course it’s pink and has zebra ornaments on it.  Don’t you have a tree like this?  She refused to put all of her ornaments on it.  I quote, “Mom I don’t want too many ornaments.”  Kids these days, like there is such a thing.  She’s 12 there is time to learn.

I changed the china cabinet this year, it’s usually filled with red.  I may keep it this way after Christmas I like the white.  I just want more.  Of course.

Last year I bought a box of Christmas “stuff” at the thrift store and these four vintage ornaments were part of the loot.  I want more!  My goal is to have a tree full of vintage next year, keep your fingers crossed.

Join the party over at The Inspired Room.

I bought a flocked tree this year and my son is not impressed, but I love!

My table is going to be so pretty, Mr. Wonderful found me wood while we were “home” for Thanksgiving so it makes my table even more special.

Isn’t the wood, gorgeous?

I changed the china cabinet this week and am pretty sure when Christmas is over I will keep it with all white dishes.

I love just the little touches of red.

Hope you are having fun getting ready for Santa!  The kids and Mr. Wonderful think I’m crazy but I sure am having fun.  I am still not finished, well maybe I am I have more that I could do but I’m enjoying the simplicity of what I have accomplished, we’ll see.

Going to link to some blog parties so I can see what some other “Crazy Ladies” have come up with.

I am pretty sure I have decided on the colors I am going to use.  I have found the base for room, please take a peek and tell me what you think.

I like the thought of teal and green together.

We have decided on leather furniture, brown is the color.  I like the set I found yesterday, but we were leaning towards a sectional so we’ll see.

I’m not sure what Mr. Wonderful is dreading most, but for whatever reason he isn’t excited about taking down the vertical blinds that I hate and replacing them with some other type of window cover.

I can’t wait to work on hanging fun stuff.

I think I might go with something a little more organized like this.

I have looked at lamps and pillows until I feel a little crazy.

I always thought I would have red in my living room because of the green hutch but I am really leaning towards teal and green.

I’m excited to get a new look now if I could just make some decisions.

The Baby Girl and I had a session with her therapist today, and I continue to be amazed at how “OK” she is.  There she sit in the office, her dressed up and carrying her DB purse.  She answered the questions but seem distracted.  Oh that’s right she has two friends waiting in the lobby.  I was pretty happy to know that with all the crap going on she was just being a typical teenager, actually made me smile.

I said it out loud today, my poor choices give us consequences I wish I could change.  I picked a loser to reproduce with and my sweet girl pays the price.  My sweet girl sits in counseling weekly and tries to process how for over half of her 12 years she hasn’t had a father.  She has written him a letter and I guess tomorrow we will mail it.  I’m not sure how I feel about the letter or the fact that she continues to give the POS chance after chance.  I don’t bad mouth him, I never mention him unless she does, I don’t encourage or discourage her.  I love her and all I want is for her to understand, but how can she understand when I can’t begin to understand.

She is a great kid and The Sperm Donor has caused her so much pain, and I don’t think he will ever do anything but cause her pain.  We told her in counseling today how close he lives to us.  We talked about boundaries and what she should do if she runs into him by herself.  I continue to think about moving and am pretty sure that’s the only way I’m going to be comfortable.

I know as sure as I’m sitting on the couch at 5 a.m. unable to sleep that The Baby Girl was a gift to me.  She has been the biggest blessing to me and I try to imagine what my life would be like without her here talking 24-7.  I can’t imagine.  I know that Mr. Wonderful was meant to be her dad and he is.  The Sperm Donor may share her DNA but that’s where his title begins and ends, he hasn’t been a parent from the beginning.

I hope The Baby Girl continues to process all of this and that she continues to know she is amazing.

Mr. Mason well don’t get me started.  Goes to show you that intelligence doesn’t give you class.  You all but spit on a little 3 year old child’s grave and then you go out and celebrate while flipping people off, now that is class.

I have written in the past about Cindy Anthony and how I understand her loving her daughter and even respect it, but come on lady.  Do you remember that a sweet little girl is dead?  The Tooth Fairy didn’t kill her, HELLO.

My heart goes out to George, I hope he finds a way to escape.  I wish someone would charter a plane for him and let him go off to a hidden hideaway.  He deserves it.  I have come to think that the entire Anthony Family was aware of what her defense would be and that they did nothing to stop her.  I won’t judge what I would do because I am honest enough to know that until faced with that I have no idea and neither does anyone else regardless of what they say.  I hope Mallory thinks long and hard before becoming Mrs. Lee Anthony….talk about the mother-in-law from hell.  Cindy gives a new meaning to Monster-In-Law.

I won’t lie and say I understand this or like it.  I will say I am beginning to think justice may be served just not as quickly or as swiftly as we would all like to see.  Can you imagine anyone who would want to change places with Casey, Cindy, George or Lee?  Talk about a hot mess.  I wonder if they’ll draw names for Christmas?

Ingrid was the first person I ever talked about death with, well the first person I ever talked about death with who was dying.  She called me in December and told me she was dying and she knew it.  It was a Monday and I was sitting on the couch and I remember hanging up the phone and just laying down and sobbing.  I guess I knew since December in my brain but my heart just never got there.  We talked about her death a lot for the last week, peaceful is just not a big enough word for how she felt.  She told me a few days before she died, “I’m the happiest woman in the world.”  She was.  I remember laying my head beside her in her bed that weekend and telling her my heart hurt and her telling me it would be ok.  She acted like I was crazy until I told her if the roles were reversed she would be sad, she said…”Oh yeah, Baby Girl I would hate to see you in this bed instead of my old ass.”  She gave us all strength, there was times when I wondered if she put on her big girl panties just to protect us all.  She was amazing.

I never would promise her to stay out of the tanning bed, she tried.  I told her I would be careful.  So Friday when I pulled into the parking lot at the tanning bed I felt a little guilt, but I reminded myself I didn’t promise her.  I got inside and when I was signing in I realized I didn’t have my keys.  I knew before I even made it to the car I had locked my keys in my car….well I actually looked up at heaven and said, “Ok Ingrid I know you are pissed, but my keys really?”  I went in and spent 6 minutes in the tanning bed, I said I’d be careful.

I came home and watched a DVR of Oprah and it was so “Ingrid”.  It was all about people being who they were meant to be and having dreams and making them come true…yeap that was Ingrid.  I couldn’t decide if I was sad or happy.  I miss her like crazy, but I wouldn’t trade my friendship and all the good times we had even for all the pain and sadness I feel now.

I headed out to the backyard with a good book still smiling thinking about her and when I opened the backdoor something caught my eye…two beautiful black butterflies.  One flew away when I got in the yard and the other just kinda hung around.

I sit outside and just looked up at the heavens like she told me and thought about her.  I had a great afternoon.

Mr. Wonderful came home from work and commented about all the bird shit in the backyard and I just started laughing, she told T.B. she would feel her presence in birds and T.B. recently had a cardinal build a nest in a fake tree on her patio and now my backyard is being invaded by birds.  No doubt she is still with me…us!  I miss you Ms. Ingrid Fabian!

I had the best day today!  It was simple BUT so much fun.  Actually the entire weekend was fun.  I sometimes feel like these kids are growing up so fast and they have forgotten about “Good ole’ Mom or Ma if you are Shane” and then they do something I know they really care less about and they do it just for me.  Like color and hunt Easter eggs…..

The quotes from this weekend are classic.  “I’m sure my basket is the best”, says the 21 year old son, “Why do you say that”, is asked by the 12 year old….his reply, “Because I’m her favorite.”    Did I mention this conversation took place between an adult and a child?

The baskets were all EQUAL.  No one had a better basket.  I swear.

They do not come any cuter!  This girl was an hour late for dinner, I couldn’t even be mad….not when she sent me the cutest text ever.

I love when Lena says, “Take another picture of me.”  The above picture of Shane reminds me of when Lena use to dress him up like a girl and pretend he was her sister.  L.O.V.E.!

I was reminded today that my grown kids have class.  I was reminded that even though I have been far from perfect I obviously did something right.  They amaze me.

I am one very lucky mother!

I’ve decided that at least for the next thirty days I’m going to post something on my Facebook wall that I feel thankful/blessed to have.  No big surprise today I picked Mr. Wonderful.  I tell him all the time how thankful I am to have him as my partner in life, during good and bad he is by my side.  Blessed I am.  I was smiling from ear to ear when I noticed that he commented back that he’s lucky to have me.  I know he feels that way, but it was still nice to see.  I’ve blogged in the past that our road had been quite bumpy and most of the bumps weren’t even our own doing.  I was talking to a friend today about how hurt I get for him and the nonsense that people who claim to love him throw his way on a regular basis and she reminded me of one of my favorite quotes. 

“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.” Wayne Dyer

I have to say if this saying is true, there are some folks who better be watching for a semi to come rolling over them.  I have asked myself for seven years what I was suppose to learn from the heartache that these mean spirited people have brought to my doorstep.  I am starting to “see” the lessons.

• I don’t judge people like I use to, I never will again.
• I will be loving and supportive to my children and their decision in relationships.
• I don’t “stretch” the truth about ailments, I’ve been living “the little boy who cried wolf story” (it’s just not a little boy, it’s an adult) for seven years and it’s not pretty.  I have learned to laugh about it though instead of getting angry.
• You don’t hurt people you really love, and by pretending their spouse doesn’t exist you are hurting him whether you want to believe it or not.

I love Mr. Wonderful and I know that the very people who did everything in their power in the past and in the present to come between us have actually made us closer to each other, blessed The Kid with a loving father, and made him see they don’t love him they just want to control him.  Sad huh?

I get tickled when I think about these folks and the fact that they call themselves “Christian”.  Really.  Well I wonder where you missed-

That is why a man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become one flesh. – Genesis 2:24

“Do not judge—or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?” Matthew 7:1-4.

A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed. The heart of him who has understanding seeks knowledge, but the mouths of fools feed on folly.  Proverbs 15:13-14

I use to spend so much time trying to figure out who the prank phone calls were from or why these people wanted Mr. Wonderful alone and single and then we went to counseling and Mr. Wonderful heard loud and clear….”These people do not care about your happiness.”  I still remember the counselor telling him if he was marrried to The Mother Theresa they would find fault in her.  I just don’t understand it.  I have plenty of people that I love and care about and I don’t particularly like their spouse guess what, “I suck it up.”

I spent more sleepless nights wondering how someone could tell me they were “relieved” my infant son died in my arms, but you know six years later I know God allowed me to hear that comment to understand just how sick this individual was.  I bet I have told 50 people about this comment and all of them have offered to kick her butt.  I know I don’t have to worry about that because she’ll stand before God someday and be held accountable for that statement.  It’s not my place to judge.  I’ve made it a full-time job to love my husband in spite of it all and make sure we cling to each other even tighter.

So what started out as hearbreaking has turned into a blessing, I will love my children’s spouses whether I like them or not.  I will never make my children pick between me or their spouse.  I know seems like common sense but nope it’s not believe me.

I have had years of not having to deal with these folks and have been quite content.  I wonder when they will realize I am complimented by their dislike of me.  It reminds me that birds of a feather really do flock together and since I happen to have a huge heart, am a Christian, strive to do the right thing, have never stolen anything, love to have fun and avoid drama at all cost I totally understand why these folks “don’t like me.”  I’m thankful. 

I will encourage my own children to be respect their new stepmother.  They don’t have to like her and I actually smile when The First Born describes her soon to be stepmother as “different”.  I just want them to have a good relationship with their dad and his spouse will be a big part of that relationship so I encourage them to accept the good in her and overlook the quirks.  After all don’t we all have quirks?  I would be so upset with my kids if they treated this woman with anything but respect and kindness after all what would it say about me as a mom if I raised a couple of heathens.  I have learned that some folks just don’t get that, again another blessing.

Mr. Wonderful may not be perfect, but he’s perfect for me!  He knows I never asked him to choose, I just asked for him to “protect” me from the craziness and he has.  I asked that people who came to home respected me, they couldn’t.

If you are reading this and your a nasty mother-in-law or a pot stirring stepchild be careful you might end up married into a similiar situation.  Remember karma.  More importantly remember you aren’t hurting the person you are trying to hurt, because the person you are trying to hurt is sitting back shaking their head at how crazy you are….the person you are hurting is the person you claim to love.